People in this day in age are very particular when it comes to liquids (first world problems), especially when it comes to mixing it with an alcoholic beverage. But sometimes we get it right, and other times we wake up thinking why the hell did I mix Ciroc with blueberry juice? So now every time you go near anything blueberry, bad memories of you puking it back up behind the dumpster comes to mind. Ugh, then you make a mental note to tell your mom not to make the blueberry pie for the next three Christmases unless she wants there to be projectile on the ham. So to avoid that situation again, here is a little low down on good and bad chasers.
Good Chasers
First things first, the real chaser is no chaser… Be like my main girl Iggy and never chase that. Be a freaking man you p****.
Just kidding….
Pretty much anything really fizzy related like Coke, Dr. Pepper, Sprite, etc., make excellent chasers. Notice how I only listed coke products versus Pepsi products? That is because Pepsi products absolutely suck for chasers, except Mountain Dew… That is the only exception here. I understand that there is a huge debate between Coke and Pepsi… But Coke is way better and that is a fact. You never hear anyone ask at the bar for a jack and Pepsi, hell no. It is Jack and coke, so stick to the coke products por favor. And do not forget about the ale and tonic (gin mixes well with tonic).
Ice tea is always a good option. Snapple, Brisk, and Lipton are some really good brands. They make an amaze chaser and mix well with your drink. And hey, Brisk is always a good option for a broke ass college student, because normally you can buy an entire liter for under $2. What a deal.
Energy drinks like Monster, Redbull (you also get wings), and Rockstar are pretty good to mix with. Not only will they give you energy and wake you up so you are on your game, but they also taste pretty damn great with your drink. You can hardly taste the alcohol, and all that sugar will help give you a better buzz. Right on.
Side note: I know that some of us are concerned about the calorie intake in our drinks, so if that is your concern, then I suggest sticking to the diet stuff. Diet COKE, diet Sprite etc… and heck, there are even some sugar free energy options.
And I do not care how hard you wanna diet… No chasing your alcohol with water. Let’s leave that to the insecure models whose biggest meal a day is a Tic Tac. Use a freaking chaser… Kay? Remember being all about that bass is in and ya’ll are beautiful so shake it (well not too hard).
Bad Chasers
Never chase anything with beer. Like dude I get you are trying to be a hard ass, but are you trying to get blacked out? Chill out from your “hardcore” partying and use a chaser.
Do not even chase with Smirnoff Ices, Seagrams, Redds or Woodchucks… Formally known as adult soda. Even though they have a low percentage of alcohol and only high schoolers get drunk off them, but still that low percentage of alcohol will eventually catch up to you.
Cranberry Juice, Apple Juice, Pineapple Juice, Grape Juice, etc… NO JUICES. What are you three? You might as well wear a diaper, eat some animal crackers and drink out of a sippy cup. No way José. The only acceptable juice is orange and that is strictly for Mimosas. No ifs, what’s, or buts. No juices!
I feel like this should be an obvious one, but who knows with today’s society. Be sure not to chase with any kind of dairy product or even coffee. If you are one of those people, that is just weird and I suggest you to knock it off (this is not a suggestion this is a demand). Like are you asking to get sick? Alcohol, dairy and coffee just do not mix…. So put the 2 percent back on the shelf and make way to the soda aisle.
So on that note, be selective with your chaser and be sure to use your newfound knowledge for making sure to pick out the right one. Use these tips and know right from wrong. Good luck, fellow lushes
