#PinnersProblems: My Hypothetical Wedding

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Like most 90’s kids, I love Disney and believe in happily ever after. I also grew up with fads like pogs, Pokémon, gel pens and Lisa Frank. But something else that is reminiscent of our fabulous generation of 90’s kids are the stupid phrases we made up, and are still making up. For example, “WASSSSUP,” “that’s hot,” and “BRB” which then evolved into “Oh. Em. Gee.,” “YOLO,” and “IDK.”  Today, however, I would like to talk about my personal favorite “forever alone.”

I am currently single and so are a lot of my friends…by choice. No, seriously we are. But regardless of the reasons behind our relationship status (or lack thereof), I think I speak for a lot of girls when I say, whenever I see a happy, smiling, make-you-want-to-puke-and-punch-a-baby, adorable couple I rarely think “Aww look at them, good for their happiness.”

Instead I think “FORRREVEERRR ALONE.” Then the imagery hits me, it’s 5 years in the future- I am a crazy puppy lady, living with my best friend eating bon-bons and ramen noodles. Slowly but surely I become a How I Met Your Mother “WOO Girl” at local happy hours, and I pick up hobbies like crocheting and cake decorating.

The funny part is while we are all slowly becoming a “WOO girl” or falling in love (if you’re lucky) we all have something in common, a Pinterest wedding board. Girls have meticulously planned their weddings out on Pinterest to the point that we know what our own future weddings will look like down to the smallest details. What is worse is without even asking, we now know what our friends’ weddings will look like too, and we judge them for it. WE JUDGE THEM FOR IT.  

We sit behind a screen, and we silently judge our closest friends for the tacky weddings THEY ARENT EVEN PLANNING YET. You know why? BECAUSE MOST OF US AREN’T ENGAGED! But no matter how crazy we know we’re being, we don’t stop. We just keep pinning and incessantly judging. I mean, who would choose orange as one of their colors anyway!?

There is no denying that we are acting like crazy people. We are picking out dresses, flowers, and color schemes as we sit on our couches, wearing our ex-boyfriends’ basketball t-shirts, pinning away in the company of the only men who will truly love us, Ben & Jerry. But we keep doing it. It’s the power of Pinterest! It truly is an addiction.

My name is Sarie, and I am addicted to Pinterst. My wedding board is FANTASTIC, but I am ridiculous and possibly “forever alone.”

And if you think I am judging you, I am not. I have my whole shabby-chic, outdoor barn, mix-matched brides maids dresses wedding, and antique engagement ring all picked out and ready to go once I find the poor schmuck who is signing up for this non-sense. But the point here is, I am and you are ridiculous.

You can follow my personal Pinterest boards here.

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