How to Avoid the Clingy Label

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Clingy, is a word that nobody likes to be described as. Turn to Urban Dictionary and you’ll see it defined as:

“A Boyfriend/Girlfriend/Significant Other who doesn’t know the definition of ‘”space”‘.

If you’re a guy or a girl, it doesn’t matter who is being referred to as “the clingy one,” being called this will NEVER benefit you. So maybe you aren’t M.V.P worthy with your flirt game, that’s okay. Whether you’re “just talking” or took it to the next level of dating, there are certain ways to avoid being “the crazy one with the obsession.”

You think to yourself: maybe there could be something there, but first let me play it cool. So first things first, once you get the green light to make some moves, clinginess is the ultimate turn off.

Don’t expect to be included every time the other person hangs out with his/her friends. We all need our personal space, if you keep nagging the people you’re interested in to include you in everything that they do with their friends it might start to freak them out. If you really like them, you’ll understand and give them their space.

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So you realize you have feelings for them, but it’s after you’ve hooked up. What does this mean to you? Do not question “what does this make us now?” directly after the hook up. Give it time, and see what happens. You’ll learn if feelings are mutual or if you are just friends with benefits. Here’s a hint: if that person tells you they’re tired after the hook up and want to go to sleep alone, chances are feelings aren’t mutual.

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You learned their daily schedule…that could be cute and creepy all at the same time. If you plan on surprising them and brightening up their day, then that can be acceptable. Although, don’t try to figure out their typical hang out spot just to “accidentally” bump into them. That’s just creepy especially if you’re doing this to find out what they’re up to. This also includes restricting where they can party just because you said so.

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I shit you not, a kiss (or in the case of being college students, any sexual act) does not always mean you’ll be dating anytime soon. This isn’t a Disney movie, and no lobsters are singing to “kiss the girl.” So you found someone at a party, both of you made some moves, sexual tension was obviously present and one thing led to another. This does not mean they’re the one for you to start dating next. So DO NOT make them your latest obsession.

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One word responses don’t always mean I’m still into you. If you’re still in the “just talking” phase, you can still come off as clingy. If you get one word responses in return, take the hint. Just move on, because they probably just friend- zoned you, and you have zero chances left at redemption.

Kendall

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