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Worldwide Political Songs

Music has been known to unite the world in song. Here is a collection of political songs that displays how weird politics can be. Some are educational to a certain degree. One lost an election (in my opinion). Some are just weird things that exist on this planet. 

We All DO Crime

First, we start with crime. International crimes. America has done a lot of crimes that go against international law. This song details some of the major crimes that United States Presidents have enabled/ordered since WW2. This song ranges from Truman to Obama. However, it does not include Trump or Biden. So let’s not let them off the hook. Donald Trump’s bombing of Qasem Soleimani back in 2020 (when WW3 potentially started as a result of this assassination was the worst part of the year). This assassination, according to the UN, was a crime as the United States did not prove that Soleimani’s killing was necessary for national security. Joseph Robinette Biden killed 10 innocent civilians, including 7 children, in Afghanistan. The bombing was to kill an ISIS-K threat they had been following all day. Then the United States tried to lie about the killings claiming the car blew before the missile hit because of a bomb in the car. As it turns out, it did not blow up before, and the target wasn’t affiliated with ISIS-K.

You are My Best Friend

Now, we turn to Kosovo. Yugoslavia’s break up in the 1990s was messy. This is shown with ethnic cleansing against Kosovians. Kosovo is a small region in south Serbia. That came under control during the middle ages before the Ottoman Empire took over the region in 1389. Serbia got the region back in 1913, but Kosovo was wildly different, forming its own identity under Ottoman rule. Kosovo was autonomous in every sense except in name while under Yugoslavian control. This autonomy created resentment among Serbians. Once Yugoslavia broke apart, war broke out throughout the region. This included Serbia wanting Kosovo back under their control. This led Serbia to ethnic cleansing of Kosovo in an attempt to retake the land. This cleansing pushed NATO to get involved in the region, bombing Serbia. This significantly helped Kosovo. As a result of this counter-offensive, Kosovo is still here and the dispute with Serbia is still ongoing. As a result of the counter-bombing, Kosovo is the most pro-America country in the world. They have streets, statues, and children named after Bill Clinton and Tony Blair (children not named Bill and Tony, but children named Klinton and Tonibler). It is also responsible for the most patriotic song in American history. 

Karl Marx Rolls Over

Now, we move to Japan. The Communist Party in Japan is one of the biggest non-controlling Communist parties in the world. Communists in Japan are seen as outdated and old. This lead them to revitalize their image in 2013. They have created a music video to change the look of the communist party in Japan. Gone is The Internationale and the old look of Communism, welcome Communist J-pop(?). It stars a SALT worker (a person who gets a job with the purpose of unionizing said workplace). She is one of nine mascots the Communist Party has adopted in its attempt to revitalize its image. My personal favorite mascot is Tawara Kometaro, he’s a bale of rice. A rousing anthem to attract weebs and communists together.

Ron Paul: Gota Catch’em All

For this one, we go back in time to 2012. The Tea Party movement in the Republican party takes the Democrat’s House in 2010. This sparks a moment in a man’s heart. One man who ran back in 2008 against John McCain. Ultimately, only gathering 1.6% of the delegates. This man thinks he can win in 2012, after the first 4 years of Barack Obama. This one man was Ron Paul. Paul has been a vital part of Libertarian thought in the United States since the 1980s. He was thought of as the godfather of the Tea Party movement in the Republican Party. A Pokemon theme parody in support of Ron Paul’s campaign, sung by the original Pokemon theme singer Jason Paige, who is a huge fan of Ron Paul.

Hillary 2016- Get ready to Suffer.

2016, Donald Trump becomes President, defeating Hillary Rodham Clinton. I am getting conspiratorial here. Hillary did not lose because of Russian interference. She did not lose because of misogyny. She lost because of herself. She and the Democratic party propped up Trump in the Republican primaries, believing he would be easily beaten. This is called the Pied Piper strategy. Hillary lost because of Pokemon Go to the POLLS. Hillary lost because she could not pour a beer (it was all head, great for Bill in 95-97, not great for 2016). The biggest reason why Hillary Clinton lost in 2016 was cringe. Hillary Clinton’s “fight song” is the reason why Conservatives have a 6-3 majority in the Supreme Court. Her fight song is why Roe V Wade was stricken down. I will warn this is the worst thing in the world.


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