We have all seen students walking around campus in terrible outfits and some of us might stop and ask, “Why the hell are they wearing that shirt with those pants?” Whether it be professors who wear hooker boots or guys who wear shorts in the dead of winter, I am here to tell you about some of the terrible fashion run-ins I have had throughout my years at Bloomsburg.
While I was walking to the Student Service Center this morning, I passed a young man who thought it was fashionable to wear a t-shirt with dragons all over it. Along with his poor choice of shirt, he decided to complete his outfit with a black trench coat and black parachute pants that looked like a skirt when he walked. So if any of you have any of these items in your closet, please throw them out, they aren’t fashionable.
It’s bad when a persons clothes can catch my attention from across the quad. That is exactly what happened to a student who thought it would be a good idea to wear mustard/puke yellow skinny jeans, which were twenty sizes too small, paired with a hot pink shirt – also way too small. The jeans weren’t so bad but paired with HOT pink…not so good. If the person decided to wear a black shirt, that fit properly, instead of pink, the outfit might have been slightly more acceptable.
While walking home from class one day, I saw a girl wearing a terrible outfit. I actually wondered if she had gotten dressed in the dark that morning. The first thing I noticed were the stripper heels she was wearing. Now, for those of you who don’t know, stripper heels are extremely high heels that are clear and have a lot of straps. You would expect a girl who wears stripper shoes around campus to be able to walk in these shoes…wrong. This poor girl was wobbling all over the place, I thought she was going to fall and break her ankle. If her shoes were her only fashion mistake, then I might have been able to let her go, but it wasn’t. She paired the shoes with tight acid wash jeans; these jeans were in style in the 1980’s, not 2009. The jeans looked like they came from the kids’ section of a department store because they were extremely tight, even though this fashion victim already looked to be a size 2. To complete the outfit, she had on a clear studded belt, a light pink tank top and a jacket that was wrapped around her wasit. I am not a fan of apparrel wrapped waists, so when I saw this, I almost fell over. Needless to say, she has to be the worst dressed person I have even seen on campus.
Now I will focus my attention on professors. A lot of professors at Bloomsburg have a very unique fashion sense, and I will tell you about the fashion no-no’s my professors have commited.
First, I will start off with the pleather jacket. This was no ordinary black pleather jacket – this was turquoise jacket and I swear when my professor moved, the jacket made a noise. (By the way, pleather is plastic leather.) Aside from the pleather jacket, the professor’s outfit wasn’t bad. She paired the horrible pleather with light khaki pants.
Two semesters ago, I had the worst dressed professor ever. I would sit through class and think of ways to fix her outfit – that’s how badly she was dressed. First of all, professors really shouldn’t wear knee-high hooker boots; it just isn’t right. Second, those hooker boots should not be paired with gaucho pants. My professor was really tall and petite, but she didn’t wear clothes that fit her properly. She would wear hooker boots, gaucho pants, and a long sweater that made her look double her size. It just didn’t look nice on her. What she needed was a cropped jacket and a shirt that hit right at the hip. She had so much potential, but she just didn’t know what to pair with what.
Not only was she poorly dressed every day, but her hair looked like a disaster. (I have curly hair and I spend 45 minutes straightening it, so I know the affects humidity has on hair. Apparently, my professor did not.) Her hair was so big and so frizzy, I wanted to bring anti-frizz spray to class. Hopefully she has changed her style since last year, or at least tamed her hair.
I am sure there are more fashion victim stories out there; if you have any stories, leave a comment and let me know. And if one of these fashion victims happens to be your friends, please take them shopping and help them buy a completely new wardrobe.
(All Photos Courtesy of Google Images.)