CU - BloomsburgOpinion and Editorial

Episode One: Relationships From a Dude’s Perspective…

Have you ever watched Sex and the City? You know, the Laguna Beach for 30 to 40 year old women? Well if you have never watched it before, like me, you’re most likely a guy, like me. And why would a guy who knows nothing about this comedy/drama (lots of this)/love television show be writing openly about it? It’s quite simple. After the initial spark of inspiration and some speedy inquiry and research, I realized that a lot of people, even guys, could benefit from the shows lessons. I’m just going to man it up a little bit.

Episode One: Relationships from a dude’s perspective…
This isn’t the high-class grandeur steeped scene of Manhattan, this is Bloomsburg, where deer outnumber people. One thing remains constant no matter where you live, or where anyone lives for that matter, and that is relationships.

We have as many types of relationships as we do flavors of skittles. We have all of the Facebook basics like: in a relationship (or dating), engaged, married, it’s complicated, and open-relationship and we can’t forget the most abundant- friendships. Navigating through the vast ocean of relationships can be tedious; each type has its own identity and a textbook-sized fictitious “rules and regulations” manual, which can read like a calculus book at times.

sex-n-city-footerDating Relationships: This is hands-down the untouchable frontrunner for the most confusing relationship award. I feel pretty safe saying that guys and girls will never understand each other, hence the conflict and confusion. This is in most peoples’ minds, the most rewarding relationship. Finding your complement is a bittersweet symphony, and I say this for two reasons. One, it’s comparable to a flawlessly performed symphony in the sense that usually it can yield the most gratifying happiness, and can create a bond like a snowflake- each one is unique. Two, it’s bittersweet because as guys and girls so often do, they disagree. The TV remote can ignite WW3 when football wants precedence over One Tree Hill. If you Sparknote the aforementioned manual, the gist is simple; to avoid confusion and catastrophe, she always wins.

It’s Complicated: This is a whole new bear to wrestle, this product of Facebook is an enigma to many. This pseudo-relationship wanna-be thing (best possible explanation) is a blazoning signal flare for a relationship in turmoil, but it is still kinda-sorta a relationship. The best way to avoid the complicated “it’s complicated” would be to figure out what’s so complicated in the first place! Then fix it.

Friendship: The most fun, most important, and by far the simplest of the Brady Bunch family of relationships. Everyone needs friends, you know, the people who are there for you through thick and thin? Through “it’s complicated” and “engaged?” Friends are the backbones on the skeleton of our being, and without any friends at all, it would be fair to assume that life would be comparable to a heaping bucket of raw sewage…with anchovies and mushrooms on top. Anyway, friends are the people who are by your side for the moments that take your breath away, for all of the memorable times in your life, to bail you out of jail if need be, and the people who you’ll stay in contact with forever. This is also the easiest type of relationship to start and the easiest to maintain. Some quick advice: start by saying “Hey!”

The Open-Relationship: There’s no better way to say “I’m into you but… I’m not willing to commit to you” then by settling for an open-relationship. I hate to be “that guy” and say it but there is zero good that is going to come out of a mutual agreement to do this. It’s really the bad egg of the family’ it’s the sibling who finds joy in tipping old ladies in wheelchairs and taking candy from babies. It would be more worthwhile to stay together, and cheat on each other here and there. Isn’t it the same thing?

The relationship family, or ocean of relationship, whichever metaphor you like better, are full of unpredictable scenarios. One minute everything is smooth sailing, next, Moby Dick has mistaken your vessel for a Twinkie, and is threatening to sink everything in a blink of an eye.

Heading back to the basis of this column, Sex and the City and relationships, or according to, the “travels of life and love” as well as “romance and sex”… Well like relationships, I’m going to start out slow, ease into it and hope it doesn’t get “complicated.”

(photos courtesy of Google Image Search)